“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22, NIV
We are in times where many young men and women do not want to unite through the institution of marriage, they want to live together without being married. As we saw in the previous articles, one of the causes may be that they come from dysfunctional homes, or they follow the psychosocial trends of our time which reject or do not believe in marriage as a valuable and noble commitment, and of which they are afraid.
For many, signing the marriage document represents being tied, or losing their freedom, or even something bad due to the traumatic experiences they lived through with their family of origin, who in some cases had violent and painful divorces, or continue together, but are no longer in love. So even though they do want the benefits of living together, marriage is of no value to them.
It is of great importance that the couple develop attitudes and behaviors that strengthen their marriage because just love is not enough to achieve it. Otherwise, the marriage may have problems or difficulties that prevent them from being happy as a couple and as a family.
Even Christian couples have seen many separations and divorces. Here are other ideas to strengthen the couple.
- Respect your partner’s freedom. Getting married is not losing the freedom of being a person, it is not depersonalizing. Many want to control their partner, they do not allow him or her to study, to develop or to think differently. These demands are disrespectful to the spouse and it is not what the Bible teaches. The couple must develop a way of life that allows both of them to grow, develop, and face life together with its successes and difficulties.
The sense of unity that is so important in the couple can only occur when each one feels free.
- Support your partner. When a person is sure that their partner will support them, it gives the person security, confidence and tranquility, and at the same time strengthens the relationship. When there is distrust a defensive state is produced which leads the couple to become estranged.
- Develop a relationship of friendship and trust. Friendship in the couple produces joy. Laughing and crying together strengthens the marriage. In friendship there is trust; you can be sincere and enjoy each other’s company. Friendship allows us to open our hearts. If you develop friendship in your marriage, you will strengthen the relationship.
- Seek God together. Have times of communion and prayer together.
- Forgive. Always forgive each other, this unites the couple spiritually.
Follow these tips and God’s blessing will be on your marriage and family. Search for things that strengthen your relationship.
We invite you to read the fourth part of this important topic.
May God help you in everything you undertake today.
Doctor Miguel and Irene Garita
Family Care Ministry
Church of the Nazarene, Mesoamerica Region
Download this article here Ideas to Improve Your Marriage Relationship (Part Three)